It has often jokingly been said, "Lead me not into temptation; I
can find it myself". Apparently, this is not enough for the FOX Television
network. Following the heels of its predecessor of sleaze, that being
"Who Wants to Marry a Multi-Millionaire?" and on the heels of
other network outings of voyeurism such as CBS' "Survivor",
"Big Brother" and MTV's "The Real World", we have
to ask ourselves just how low will these networks go in order to capture
what is a dwindling market share, now that there are over 500 channels
from which to choose thanks to the advent and rise of cable and satellite
television?
Fox's Temptation Island
Last week, FOX aired "Temptation Island". This latest effort
to satisfy the increasing ranks of the voyeurs in America and elsewhere
features four unmarried but serious couples at a resort in Belize, where
there are 26 very attractive singles running around. The object for these
couples is to run a sexual gauntlet if you will, and avoid being unfaithful
to their partners. To make matters worse, all of this is going to be recorded
on film for one and all to see.
One has to ask what kind of message this is sending to others, particularly
young people. In a day and age where we have AIDS and a plague of other
assorted sexually transmitted diseases, not to mention the risk of pregnancy,
you would think a couple of things: One, why would any couple in a monogamous
relationship whether they were sexually active or not, submit themselves
to this situation, and two, why would a television network aid and abet
in the destruction of the most sacred expression of trust?
For those of you who have read my bio you know that I am a practicing
Latter-Day Saint, and that as a member of my faith, premarital and extramarital
sexual relations is condemned in seriousness second only to murder. Those
within the faith who engage in these activities are subject to internal
church discipline that is designed to help them get back on track in living
lives of honor, integrity and trust. Those who break these rules, whether
members of any church or not, demonstrate to their partners, others and
particularly themselves that they are not worthy of trust as that is the
ultimate expression of trust.
As a church officer myself (we have a lay clergy), I have had the opportunity
to observe a number of people over the past 20 years and change, and I
can tell you that among the young single adults I observed, the ones who
abstained from sexual activity until marriage were by far the happiest
and the most guilt-free. Having survived an enlistment in the Marine Corps
and remaining a virgin until I married at age 21 while I was in college,
I can assure you that if I can do it, anyone can especially with
my libido such as it is. The ones who failed to do so found themselves
unhappy and their lives far more complicated than they needed to be. In
most instances, that was often the death knell to the relationship, as
they discovered that failure to keep that trust, even with each other,
showed that neither were ready for the commitment and responsibility that
marriage brings. In many cases, they came to the realization all too late
that sexual fidelity was the most essential ingredient in the glue that
holds not only relationships together, but also marriages in particular.
In my dealings with married people, both inside and outside of my faith,
I have come across a number of couples where adultery had entered the
picture of their lives, and in only one instance did the marriage
survive. In almost all cases, once that trust is gone it is irretrievably
lost and the best thing to do is to learn from the lesson and move on.
In many cases, the person who committed adultery is somewhat stigmatized
not only by the ex-spouse, but by the children as well who resent the
injury done to the mostly innocent parent I say mostly innocent
because if things at home were 100 per cent hunky-dory and the lines of
communication fully open, chances are the adultery may not have happened
in the first place.
I can say this in my relationships as a single man following the end
of my first marriage, and that is while I was willing to consider dating
those who had never been married as well as those who had been divorced,
the only instance where I would not date a divorced woman was if I found
out that the divorce had been for adultery on HER part. The reason for
that was that it showed me not only a lack of integrity, but also a lack
of communication skills on her part. So while I am a forgive and forget
kind of guy, when it comes to adultery, there would always remain in the
back of my mind that nagging thought that if I hooked up with her, it
could be déjà vu' all over again.
So if America is to learn anything from this new low with which the FOX
network has sunk to, it is they now have the opportunity to boycott the
FOX network as well as the sponsors of the show "Temptation Island".
The last part of The Lord's Prayer" states, " and lead
us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil". May each of learn
from these wise words in order that we may not bring that violation of
trust into either our lives or that of our families.